David's blog: 201102

Thursday, February 3rd, 2011

A racist chain e-mail and some responses:

In my e-mail inbox the other day I received a chain letter, challenging me to be one of the “only 5% of those” receiving the e-mail who would pass it on. Normally I’m immune to such challenges. If an e-mail (or a Facebook status) exhorts me to pass it on to everyone I know, I’m more likely than not to delete the e-mail (or ignore) the Facebook status, although sometimes I’ll look up the relevant entry on Snopes.com and point it out to the person who sent me the letter or posted the status.

This chain e-mail, however, was a particularly nasty one, from people “proud to be white” who think it’s perfectly okay to call people pejorative racist names and who think that white folk are somehow oppressed by African and Hispanic Americans.

So I did end up passing the e-mail on, but with a rebuttal. I sent the e-mail back to everyone whose e-mail address was in the chain e-mail, and I blind carbon copied (a skill whose utility you’ll more greatly appreciate just a few paragraphs down) a few of my friends.

One of my friends sent a reply with a helpful link to Snopes.

Perhaps more interesting was the indignant response I got from one of the strangers, a woman named Kimberlie.

I could tell you Kimberlie’s last name and point you to her MySpace and Facebook profiles (Google is your friend if you’re armed with someone’s e-mail address or name), but I’m not going to. It’s not as if Kimberlie acted alone. She is just one of many white people who feel threatened by minorities gaining some rights and overcoming some oppression. Kimberlie, like so many others, seems to think the American pie is only so big, and if minorities get a bigger share, then her share necessarily will be smaller.^*

Table of contents

The racist e-mail that started it all
My rebuttal to a racist e-mail
A helpful response from a friend, with a link to Snopes
The first response from someone indignant about my rebuttal
My first response to an indignant responder
The second response from someone indignant about my rebuttal
My second response to an indignant responder
The third response from someone indignant about my rebuttal
My third response to an indignant responder
The fourth response from someone indignant about my rebuttal
My fourth response to an indignant responder
The fifth and final response from someone no longer indignant about my rebuttal

Kimberlie was perplexed as to how I got her e-mail address ~~and how I knew she’d forwarded this racist chain e-mail on~~^*.

As to the former, I got her e-mail address because one of Kimberlie’s friends apparently doesn’t know about blind carbon copy, and a racist friend of mine didn’t think to redact the e-mail addresses from earlier in the chain before mass forwarding the e-mail on.

As to the latter, how I knew Kimberlie had forwarded this racist e-mail to all her friends, I did not know she had. All I knew, until she e-mailed me back, was that she had been a recipient of the e-mail. But from her indignant responses I now know that she too was someone proud enough to be white that she would want to continue the chain^*.

Kimberlie seems to take my rebuttal to the racist chain e-mail and my responses to her as personal attacks on her. Well, as I point out in one of my responses to her, we both have freedom of speech but neither of us has the right to be free from criticism. Any American who wants to send e-mails to friends or strangers has the right to do so, but no American has the right to keep people from criticizing and analyzing what he or she writes.

This blog entry is a bit long already, but you do not have Javascript enabled and so you cannot toggle the e-mails below. You can, however, jump to an e-mail in the convenient table of contents in the box to the right.

There’s a lot to unpack in the racist chain e-mail, and my brief rebuttal barely scratches the surface. Perhaps, if I have enough energy, I’ll address additional points in future blog posts.

^*Update 2/4/2011: Kimberlie says she did not forward the racist e-mail to anyone. I assumed that she had because of the tone of her e-mails and because she asserted in her first e-mail to me that “If [she] want[s] to forward something on to whomever [she] want[s] it is [her] right.”

I apologized in e-mail to Kimberlie for that mistaken assumption, and I apologize again here now.

I do not, however, apologize for having sent my rebuttal or for including her in the people copied on that rebuttal. I do not think it a gross imposition on her to receive a single e-mail from a stranger nor to receive replies to e-mails asking me questions.

The fifth and final response from someone who received a copy of my rebuttal:

From: A stranger named Kimberlie

To: David Lauri

Subject: Re: A rebuttal to a racist chain e-mail

After emailing with you so many times I realized you had figured I had forwarded the email....I would like you to know that I do not dislike you I think that racism is very real in America and I know this I have lived in big cities most of my life including Chicago and Los Angeles I have also lived in predominately white areas such as Roseburg Oregon but I also know that racism isn't just against minorities anymore.....I agree with most of what you have to say and I think discrimination of any kind is out of line. I applaud the volunteer work and the fact that you would jump in to help a worthy cause I believe for standing up for others especially when they cannot stand for themselves as for my facebook yes I know that strangers can view my photos and read my wall postings but I am not opposed to strangers in a social network I like making new friends I was upset because a friend of mine sent me the email I don't know if he is racist or not but he is a friend and he has the right to do what he pleases and if I get an email from him that I do not like I simply delete it but to get something from someone I do not know put me in the wrong place I was wrong to react the way I did and I apologize for that. I hope that you also have a nice life and if you make a difference with your emails don't stop it is nice (it may not seem that way) that you are willing to take criticism back it doesn't matter if people agree or disagree with you if you have a passion for what you are doing. The last word does not mean that much to me but making sure someone is accurate in their work does I do not mind the emails from you and I believe in ending racism but always be ready for fuel to help the fire burn

My fourth response to an indignant responder:

From: David Lauri

To: Kimberlie

Subject: Re: A rebuttal to a racist chain e-mail

Wow. So you know you did not forward the e-mail and you get all upset because I copied you on a response that was sent to a lot of people.

You’re right that I assumed you had forwarded the e-mail on.

I hadn’t assumed that initially -- initially I didn’t even think anything about you specifically. Yours was just one among a bunch of e-mail addresses. The only people I knew for sure had forwarded the e-mail were xxx@aol.com, who sent it to me; xxx@yahoo.com, who sent it to xxx@aol.com; xxx@charter.net, who sent it to xxx@yahoo.com and also to you; xxx@live.com, who sent it to xxx@charter.net; and xxx@aol.com, who sent it to xxx@live.com. (Incidentally only xxx@aol.com was clever enough to use BCC when sending it on.)

It was only after I got an indignant e-mail from you that I assumed that you too must have sent the e-mail on. I figured that anyone who had not forwarded the e-mail on wouldn’t have been bothered enough by what I said to e-mail me back. In addition you said in your first e-mail to me, “If I want to forward something on to whomever I want to it is my right.”

So I was wrong about your having forwarded the e-mail. I apologize for assuming that, and I’ll say as much on my blog.

But if you did not send the e-mail on, then I did not call you a racist. What I said in my initial e-mail was, “The people who send this message on have a lot to learn about racism.” If you did not send the e-mail on to anyone, then that sentence and my rebuttal isn’t about you.

And you have the right to think that I should not be e-mailing strangers with my opinions, but you’re wrong about my having barraged you with e-mails. You got copied on one e-mail. The rest of my e-mails to you were replies to your e-mails. If you had never replied to my original, unwanted e-mail, you would never have heard from me again.

As for my qualifications? I’m a long-time volunteer facilitator for the Dayton Dialogue on Race Relations, and it’s through that group that I learned a lot about privilege and power. But I also don’t think it takes any special qualifications to understand a term like nigger to be racist.

In case you’re interested, and you seem to be since you asked again what my qualifications are, privilege is not something you can earn.

For example, just by being white, you can drive through Oakwood (an upper class suburb of Dayton, where I live), and have a reasonable expectation that the police wouldn’t stop you unless you really were doing something wrong like speeding. Black people don’t have that same privilege -- in many places in America in 2011 (we’re talking about conditions right now, not 100 years ago), black people get stopped just for “driving while black,” not because they’re speeding or driving recklessly, and they’re asked why they’re driving in a particular neighborhood.

If you want to read more about white privilege, you can Google it, or you can start with these web pages:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/White_privilege (Wikipedia page about white privilege)
http://jimbuie.blogs.com/journal/2007/11/50-examples-of-.html (50 examples of white privilege)

There’s also, of course, male privilege and heterosexual privilege and Christian privilege.

I also work as a web developer at the Miami Valley Fair Housing Center. Ongoing testing by our agency and by agencies like ours across the country shows evidence of continued discrimination based on race across the country. For example, if one tester (a kind of mystery shopper) who is black asks to see an apartment and is told the apartment is not available, but then later the same day a white tester with the same income profile, etc., is told that the apartment is in fact available, that’s a pretty good indication of race-based discrimination. These are conditions as of today, not 100 years ago. The playing field is not yet equal.

But all that’s probably more than you want to know, especially from me.

I’ll let you have the last word if you like. You can e-mail me back and say whatever you like, and I will not e-mail back to you ever again unless you specifically ask me to.

However, I also will continue to call out racist ugly mass chain e-mails when I receive them. I don’t care that you think I’m wrong to do so, although I’ll concede that my doing so may not be very effective--and I said that in my original rebuttal (“I doubt I can change many minds with what I’m writing here”).

Have a nice life. And by the way, you probably should check the privacy settings on your Facebook account. I was indeed able to find it by searching on Facebook for your e-mail address, and after finding your profile, I was able to view your photographs and read your wall postings. You can change those settings in Facebook so that only your friends (and friends of friends if you like) can see that stuff.

The fourth indignant response from someone who received a copy of my rebuttal:

From: A stranger named Kimberlie

To: David Lauri

Subject: Re: A rebuttal to a racist chain e-mail

But you're not right that it's not the least bit racist to forward on an e-mail that tries to make it seem okay to call people nigger, kike, towel head, sand-nigger, camel jockey, beaner, gook or chink

And here is where you are wrong again I did not forward this email but it was forwarded to me and why is it alright for them to call me white racist names? And why should I have to filter you I shouldn't have to filter you because someone decided to email me a forward that you don't agree with. And I don't care about what your beliefs are (I agree that you have every right to belief what you want) and I don't really care about what you think of me (everyone's opinions are different and I can't live my life trying to please everyone) but I do care that you think it is ok to sit on your high horse and think that everyone else needs to hear you opinion because they received an email from someone. I am not the kind of person to sit idly by and let you barrage me with your opinion when I don't know you. It may have been different if I knew who you were and it was just some friendly controversy between acquaintances but I as many of the people who received your email don't know you. And just so we are clear I never once said you were wrong to not call people rude and racist names but I think it is wrong for everyone! Not just for white people but for everyone! I do not use language like what has been referred to in your email and the email that was forwarded to me I do not call people racist or unflattering names I respect everyone's right to live and everyone's right to be who they are. But I don't agree that you should be righting my wrongs if I have done nothing wrong. Receiving an email from someone does not justify me to be racist. And also to be clear I do not think you are ignorant but I do think you went about your rebuttal in a very wrong way. And I never said you were unqualified I just simply asked what your qualifications were? And your rebuttal isn't what bothered me it is that someone who doesn't have the whole story is making assumptions about others that he knows nothing about...most of the people you sent your rebuttal to are people whom the email was forwarded to not people who forwarded it on but my point is that if I had wanted to send this email on I can and I shouldn't have to worry that someone else who receives it (whom I don't know) is going to chastise me. And why do I keep replying...maybe it is because I don't agree with the email but that I just deleted it and went on my marry little way without having to send a mass email out to people who don't know me Maybe it's because I like a little confrontation every now and then I don't really know but I do know that I felt like you grouped a bunch of people together that maybe didn't deserve to be, and I am the kind of person to stick up for people. I don't agree with racism but not only do I not agree with racism but I don't agree in any racism not just racism against Chinese, African Americans, Muslims, Canadians, Irish, Russian, Spanish, Mexican ect but I also don't agree with racism to Americans. So who knows maybe I am the ignorant one but I still don't think that you should be emailing people you don't know there are better ways to go about getting your opinion out there.

And here is another fact you are wrong about I am not perplexed on how you got my email I know how and I dont care and you should fix your blog because not only did I not say that I agree with the email nore did I say that I think whites are oppressed by minorities but I did say that I should be able to do what I want witout you chastisng me for something you don't know that I did or did not do.

It's not as if Kimberlie acted alone. She is just one of many white people who feel threatened by minorities gaining some rights and overcoming some oppression. Kimberlie, like so many others, seems to think the American pie is only so big, and if minorities get a bigger share, then her share necessarily will be smaller.

I am not threatened by minorities or any one of a differant race religon or ethinc background I accept people for who they are and if you want to send them to my facebook or myspace that is on you but then who is passing judgement on someone without understanding?

and again you are wrong I did not forward this email but I do believe that if I would have felt the need to it is my right

Kimberlie seems to take my rebuttal to the racist chain e-mail and my responses to her as personal attacks on her

Again wrong but I do think that people should be allowed to express there beliefs with friends.

My third response to an indignant responder:

From: David Lauri

To: Kimberlie

Subject: Re: A rebuttal to a racist chain e-mail

You’re correct that you have the right not to receive e-mails from me. I see that you’re using Gmail. Set up a filter that checks for david@davidlauri.com in the from field and deletes any e-mail coming in that matches it. Problem solved.

If I then try sending you e-mails from another account, or if I send messages to you on Facebook, or if I look up your postal address and send you letters, then perhaps I’d be harassing you. Including you on a mass e-mail and replying to your replies is not harassing you.

You’re also correct to be proud of having served as a soldier and to be proud of having worked for what you have.

But you’re not right that it’s not the least bit racist to forward on an e-mail that tries to make it seem okay to call people nigger, kike, towel head, sand-nigger, camel jockey, beaner, gook or chink.

And you’re also not right that you are “allowed to put [your] thoughts out there without receiving criticism.” That right is not in the Constitution. That’s what free speech is all about -- you have the right to say whatever you want, so long as it’s not libelous or dangerous (crying fire in a crowded theater) -- but then everyone else also has the right to say whatever they want, including about what you’ve said.

Say I’m unqualified to say that you’re racist, say that I’m ignorant, say whatever you want about me. That’s your right. I don’t have the right not to be criticized by you.

I also think that you’re wrong when you claim that you “don’t care about [my] beliefs.” If you didn’t care about my beliefs, you’d have deleted my e-mail without so much as a passing thought. Instead you keep replying to me, questioning who I am to judge you. According to you, I’m an idiot, I’m unqualified to judge you, and my opinions of you don’t matter. Then a stupid rebuttal from me shouldn’t bother you one damn bit.

All I did to start this was to say that I found that chain e-mail to be racist and wrong. I had no idea whether you, Kimberlie, had sent it to anyone -- all I knew was that you were one of many recipients of it. No other person whom I included in my mass reply has written me back trying to justify the e-mail. Probably a bunch of the people who got my rebuttal agree with you and think I’m an idiot. But you thought I was an idiot worth replying to, an idiot whose opinion you do care enough about to keep writing back to. Why is that?

The third indignant response from someone who received a copy of my rebuttal:

From: A stranger named Kimberlie

To: David Lauri

Subject: Re: A rebuttal to a racist chain e-mail

Who am I? I am a United States Soldier I am a women that has worked my ass off to get what I have. I came from a family that had little to nothing and worked my way up. I am a person who doesn't persecute people because they have different believes than I do. I am a person who is understanding that sometimes when people forward stuff to me I can forward and not have some idiot who knows absolutely nothing about me sending me emails talking about something he obviously knows nothing about. You talk about the ghettos have you ever been to one? I have and as a white girl in NYC I have seen the ghetto have you? As a soldier in our United States military I have seen Iraq and seen how white soldiers are treated and blown up because radicals don't agree with America. Tell me what you have seen that makes you so qualified to tell people what is racist and what isn't?! I also have the right to not receive emails from people who have no idea who I am... just because you have the right to speak your mind doesn't mean I have to listen to it and it doesn't mean you have the right to harass me through my private email. And I am allowed to put my thoughts out there without receiving criticism...You may be an amercing but so am I and not only am I an American but I am one of those Americans who have fought for your and my right to free speech! You are forcing your opinion on every person you forwarded your stupid rebuttal to... that has no idea who the hell you are! And you singled out every person whom you don't know that you forwarded your freakin rebuttal to. I have enough respect for people that I may not even know to not send things to them that not only to they not care (I don't care about your beliefs or lack thereof) but about things they don't want to hear from people they don't give a damn about...You want to talk about people being racist why don't you go spend a day in Iraq like so many of us soldiers have done and see who the racists are...open your eyes! I am not a racist person I have friends and family of all different races sexual orientation religions ect but I also believe that if I think someone may get a kick outta a freakin email I can forward said email without some asshole responding to an email that I DID NOT send to YOU if you have some stupid reply then keep it to the people who know you respond to your friend whom you disagree with not everyone who may have an opinion different from your own!

My second response to an indignant responder:

From: David Lauri

To: Kimberlie

Subject: Re: A rebuttal to a racist chain e-mail

Who am I? Who are you?

We’re both Americans with the right to free speech. You seem to think, however, that you’re allowed to put your ideas out there without receiving any criticism in return. That’s not how it works. You have the right to free speech but you do not have the right not to have what you say analyzed and criticized.

And how on earth can I force my views on you? It’s not as if I even tried. I’m not outside your house picketing you for forwarding a racist e-mail. I didn’t single you out. I didn’t post your name and address to my website, pointing out what you said. I just included your address among all the others I found in the chain letter. If telling you I disagree with you is forcing my views on you, then so too is your forwarding an e-mail to other people.

Here’s a hint for you. If you don’t want ever to receive any criticism, then be sure to tell the friends to whom you forward racist e-mails that you want your name removed before they forward it on to other people. That won’t keep people from criticizing what you say, but at least that criticism won’t come back directly to your sensitive ears.

I do think you’re wrong for agreeing with a racist chain letter, but so what? You should be able to go on quite happily with your life, just as I’ll be able to go on quite happily with mine even though I know you think I’m ignorant and wrong.

The second indignant response from someone who received a copy of my rebuttal:

From: A stranger named Kimberlie

To: David Lauri

Subject: Re: A rebuttal to a racist chain e-mail

And who are you to decide what is appropriate for others to forward just because you have veiws of something doesn't mean you can force your opinion onto others especially strangers do not email ever again no matter who sends you an email that you disagree with

My first response to an indignant responder:

From: David Lauri

To: Kimberlie

Subject: Re: A rebuttal to a racist chain e-mail

You can thank one of your friends who forwarded an e-mail without blind carbon copying people for your e-mail address getting out.

And sure you can forward racist e-mails to all your friends if you like. Don’t be surprised however if someone calls you on it then.

The first indignant response from someone who received a copy of my rebuttal:

From: A stranger named Kimberlie

To: David Lauri

Subject: Re: A rebuttal to a racist chain e-mail

Who are you and how did you get my email address?

If I want to forward something on to whomever I want to it is my right...and you are wrong not only do white people have to work for their privilege but not all white people are privileged....I work very hard for everything I have which may not be much but it is mine. I think that you are misguided and need to look at the world today not how it was a hundred years ago. Evolution changes everyone and minorities and women are not the underprivileged anymore we have just as much right to privilege as anyone else they just have to work for it just like everyone else....

you are the one who has alot to learn about racism sexism and heterosexism as well as all the isms!

A helpful response from a friend, with a link to Snopes:

From: A friend named Nancy

To: David Lauri

Subject: Re: A rebuttal to a racist chain e-mail

David, great response. Thanks for sharing. You might also have pointed out that the attribution to Michael Richards is wrong. He did spew racist remarks at a comedy club, but he didn’t say this and I think he later apologized. This is the snopes explanation: http://www.snopes.com/politics/soapbox/proudwhite.asp

One of my pet peeves is the stuff that gets sent on and on without anyone checking its veracity. I have snopes and factcheck bookmarked & can reach them with 2 key strokes. I have pissed off quite a few “friends” when I sent back to them the inaccuracies of what they forward. A couple people have asked, “What’s the harm. I don’t believe it all.” I answer that people are forming opinions and even voting based on believing these exaggerations or sometimes outright lies. If even 10% believe the stuff is true, that can swing an election.

Sorry that your good deed prompted a rant from me about my pet peeve!

Nancy

My rebuttal to a racist e-mail:

From: David Lauri

To: My friend Bill and everyone else whose e-mail address was in the forwarded chain e-mail I received

Subject: A rebuttal to a racist chain e-mail

Sorry, Bill, but you sent this to the wrong person.

The people who send this message on have a lot to learn about racism (and probably about sexism and heterosexism and a bunch of other isms as well).

Something white people have that black people don’t have is privilege. White people don’t need a white history month because white people haven’t been oppressed or excluded from power the same way that black people or women or queers have been.

And yes, something else that white people have that black people don’t have is power. Yes, Barack Obama is black but out of 44 presidents there has only been one black one. There are no black senators right now (and there have only ever been six black senators).

White people don’t need White Pride days because no one with privilege and power ever tells white people it’s bad to be white.

This e-mail that so many people seem to want to forward to all their friends points out that ghettos are dangerous. Do ghettos get the same services, the same police protection, etc., that rich white gated communities or even white suburbs get? And do people growing up in the ghettos have the same opportunities that privileged white children get?

I doubt I can change many minds with what I’m writing here, but I can at least stand up and say I won’t be a silent party to what this e-mail represents.

So, no, I’m not going to be one of the 5% who pass this racist chain letter on, but I will be someone who replies to it and says, yes, it’s wrong, it’s ignorant and it’s racist.

The racist e-mail that started it all:

From: A friend of mine named Bill

To: Me and a couple dozen other people

Subject: FW: racist?

REALLY GOOD POINT, THINGS I HAVE THOUGHT ABOUT TOO.....I THINK I MIGHT BE RACIST

wondering about why Whites are racists, and no other race is......

Michael Richards
Proud to be White

Michael Richards makes his point................... Michael Richards better known as Kramer from TVs Seinfeld does make a good point.

This was his defense speech in court after making racial comments in his comedy act. He makes some very interesting points...

Someone finally said it. How many are actually paying attention to this? There are African Americans, Mexican Americans, Asian Americans, Arab Americans, etc.

And then there are just Americans. You pass me on the street and sneer in my direction. You call me 'White boy,' 'Cracker,' 'Honkey,' 'Whitey,' 'Caveman'... And that's OK..

But when I call you, Nigger, Kike, Towel head, Sand-nigger, Camel Jockey, Beaner, Gook, or Chink .. You call me a racist.

You say that whites commit a lot of violence against you.... So why are the ghettos the most dangerous places to live?

You have the United Negro College Fund. You have Martin Luther King Day.

You have Black History Month. You have Cesar Chavez Day.

You have Yom Hashoah. You have Ma'uled Al-Nabi.

You have the NAACP. You have BET.... If we had WET (White Entertainment Television), we'd be racists. If we had a White Pride Day, you would call us racists.

If we had White History Month, we'd be racists.

If we had any organization for only whites to 'advance' OUR lives, we'd be racists.

We have a Hispanic Chamber of Commerce, a Black Chamber of Commerce, and then we just have the plain Chamber of Commerce.. Wonder who pays for that??

A white woman could not be in the Miss Black American pageant, but any color can be in the Miss America pageant.

If we had a college fund that only gave white students scholarships... You know we'd be racists.

There are over 60 openly proclaimed Black Colleges in the US .. Yet if there were 'White colleges', that would be a racist college.

In the Million Man March, you believed that you were marching for your race and rights. If we marched for our race and rights, you would call us racists.

You are proud to be black, brown, yellow and orange, and you're not afraid to announce it. But when we announce our white pride, you call us racists.

You rob us, carjack us, and shoot at us. But, when a white police officer shoots a black gang member or beats up a black drug dealer running from the law and posing a threat to society, you call him a racist.

I am proud...... But you call me a racist..

Why is it that only whites can be racists??

There is nothing improper about this e-mail... Let's see which of you are proud enough to send it on. I sadly don't think many will. That's why we have LOST most of OUR RIGHTS in this country. We won't stand up for ourselves!

BE PROUD TO BE WHITE!

It's not a crime YET... But getting very close!

It is estimated that ONLY 5% of those reaching this point in this e-mail, will pass it on.